"Oh no, i don't wanne wake up this time
I'm fine just let me be lonely
This coma is giving me a way out
Just leave me here 'till i'm over me,
'till i'm over me

I just want to sleep, never want to wake up
Cause i'm in too deep, try and keep my eyes shut
I just want to sleep, never want to wake up
Cause i'm in too deep
I just can't take another day
No, i won't take another"




I hate myself and my fucking life
I hate december, Sinterklaas, Christmas, New Years Eve
I feel like stabbing the whole world with a knife

I want my fucking life back, from 2 years ago

I'm sick of it ;-;

and don't tell me how sorry you feel for me or shit, 'caus nobody REALLY means it, and if you don't mean it, you should keep your mouth shut

stole this from


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

001. Real name? Marthe Elizabeth
002. Nickname(s)? Moes, Mouse, Muis [it all means the same, lol]
003. Zodiac sign? WEEGSCHAAL [dunno what it is in English]
004. Male or female? a lil girl~
005. Elementary? forgot the name x3
006. Middle School? IBS de Oanrin & IBS de Bernebrêge
007. High School? Van Hearsmasingel
008. Hair color? original; blonde, now red/brownisch-blonde O_ó
009. Long or short? in between? it's long for me.. never had it this long in YEARS
010. Loud or Quiet? both, depends on my mood
011. Sweats or Jeans? Jeans
012. Phone or Camera? Camera
013. Health freak? a little bit
014. Drink or Smoke? NO~!
015. Do you have a crush on someone? kinda..
016. Eat or Drink? I prefer both
017. Piercings? pierced ears *giggle* and I want a lippiercinge, sooner or later
018. Tattoos? yeaah! on both my feet a catpaw =3

HAVE YOU EVER?
019. Been in an airplane? never.
020. Been in a car accident? not really
021. Been in a fist fight? no, I had a bitchfight today, does that count? *glares at Koen*

FIRSTS:
022. First piercing? my ears, when I was 14
023. First best friend? Jasmijn, when I was 2 or 3
025. First award? can't remember winning one..
026. First crush? like REAL crush? 16 O___O
028. First big vacation? 1991, to France~

LASTS:
029. Last person you talked to? mommy
030. Last person you texted? Froukje, a very good friend
031. Last person you watched a movie with? Koen
032. Last food you ate? hamburger~
033. Last movie you watched? the little mermaid <3
034. Last song you listened to? ehhh.. forgot it XD
035. Last thing you bought? AA-drink
036. Last person you hugged? Koen I think.. or Herman

FAVES:
037. Food? Chickin' Curry
038. Drinks? Tea & chocolatemilk
039. Clothing? skinnyjeans & bandshirts
040. Book? the Timetravelers Wife
041. Music? Punk, Metal, Pop and alllll in between
042. Flower? Sunflowers and red roses
043. Colors? Pink and blue
044. Movies? disney [aa]
045. Shoes? converse all star
046. Subjects? painting

IN THE PAST YEAR I ... :
047. [ ] kissed in the snow
048. [ ] celebrated Halloween
049. [x] had your heart broken
050. [ ] went over the minutes on your cell phone
051. [x] someone questioned your sexual orientation
052. [ ] came out of the closet
053. [ ] gotten pregnant
054. [ ] had an abortion
055. [x] done something you've regretted
056. [x] broke a promise
057. [x] hid a secret
058. [x] pretended to be happy
059. [x] met someone who changed your life
060. [x] pretended to be sick
061. [ ] left the country
062. [ ] tried something you normally wouldn't try and liked it
063. [x] cried over the silliest thing
064. [ ] ran a mile
065. [ ] went to the beach with your best friend
066. [x] stayed single the whole year

CURRENTLY:
067. Eating? nothing
068. Drinking? nothing, I want to make some tea after this~
069. I'm about to? getting my stuff ready for a photoshoot
070. Listening to? nobody
071. Plans for today/tomorrow? going to school
072. Waiting for? money. I need money.. NOW

YOUR FUTURE:
073. Want kids? no way
074. Want to get married? If I find the right guy (:
075. Careers in mind? Art teacher/photographer

WHICH IS BETTER ON A BOY/GIRL?
076. Lips or eyes? Eyes
077. Shorter or taller? hé has to be taller uhuu.
078. Romantic or spontaneous? combination =3
079. Nice stomach or nice arms? both?
080. Sensitive or loud? both XD
081. Hookup or relationship? Relationship
082. Troublemaker or hesitant? hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:
083. Lost glasses/contacts? don't have those things
084. Ran away from home? when I was 8 years.. I think I was gone for 15 minutes..
085. Held a gun/knife for self defense? nope
086. Killed somebody? in a game.. YES in real life.. NO!
087. Broken someone's heart? Not that I know of
088. Been arrested? nope
089. Cried when someone died? nobody died..

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
090. Yourself? no
091. Miracles? no
092. Love at first sight? no
093. Heaven? dunno
094. Santa Claus? I believe in Sinterklaas! >=[
095. Sex on the first date? no
096. Kiss on the first date? depends on the person I date with XD

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
097. Is there one person you want to be with right now? yeahh. *sighs*
098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life? for the things I do.. yes.
099. Do you believe in God? No
100. Post as 100 truths and tag 10 people. GO FUCKING TAG YOURSELF

How to freak out your parents~

Yesterday I was at friends of mine, who gave me late-birthday presents.
And the know I want two rats, but can't have them atm.. so one of the presents where two rat-plushies =3
So I txtd my mom 'They gave me 2 rats '
reaction 'NOO!!'
'They're called Ikea & Knuffels!' [dutch for plushies]
My mom called my dad up, because she freaked out.. and called me after that, and told me she didn't want them in house..
so. I told her they're no real animals, and we where laughing out SOO FUCKING out loud x'3
That was a big relief for her, I think xD my dad called me up later and laughed about it too, hehe. love fooling them.

1.Who is your celebrity crush?
Billie Joe x3

2.What are you most excited for?
atm? ehr.. going to Zeeland tomorrow ^^

3.What was the last thing you bought?
a green day bandana & shirt, yesterday @ their concert <3

4.What was the cutest thing you've seen today?
the photo's I made of Billie Joe x3

5.Does the weather affect your mood?
don't know, didn't went outside today [aa]

6.Tell me 5 things you can't live without:
1. camera
2. music
3. friends
4. chocolatemilk
5. my computer

7.Say something to the person who tagged you:
I tagged myself D=
__

NEXT~

WHAT WERE YOU DOING...
1 MINUTE AGO: starting this thing
1 HOUR AGO: watching Twilight
1 DAY AGO: BEING AT THE GREEN DAY CONCERT
1 YEAR AGO: probably crying

I LOVE: somebody
I HATE: somebody
I FEAR: spiders & blood
I FEEL: sick
I HIDE: in my room
I MISS: somebody *sigh*
I NEED: to go to bed
I KNOW: I have to go to bed
I THINK: too many

First piercing: My ears, when I was 13

Last big car ride: busride was yesterday.. carride was 2 months ago
Last movie seen in theaters: Slumdog Millionaire
Last food consumed: pizza
Last person you texted/called: Marieke
Last CD played: Green Day - Warning
Last drink you had: water

SHORT ANSWER.
I AM: tired.
I HAVE: chocolatemilk = D
I LIKE: my new photo's [[link] x3]
I WISH: I could re-do a lot of things x__X
I DANCE: when I'm toooo happy and hyper
I CRY: daily

FAVORITES

NUMBER: dunno
COLOR: pink & yellow
DAY(S): Fridays and the saturdays when i don't have to go to work \o/
MONTH(S): doctober, my birthday+gorgeous sunlight & colours outside
SEASON: autumn
DRINK: chocolatemilk

IN THE LAST 2 DAYS, HAVE YOU...
CRIED?: yesh
HELPED SOMEONE?: can't remember
GOTTEN SICK?: yep
GONE TO THE MOVIES?: No.
SAID 'I love you'?: kinda
TALKED TO AN EX?: no.. T_T
WRITTEN IN A DIARY?: I always forget when I've got a diary, so I stopped that years ago
HAD A SERIOUS TALK?: no, my head hurts too much for that

_______ Best ________
1. Male Friend: Yoeri
2. Female Friend: Kim & Froukje
3. Best Age: none
4. Best Memory: makes me cry

_______ Worst ________
1. Time Of Day: early morning, when I have to go to school D=
2. Day Of The Week: thuesday
3. Food: hutspot D=
4. Memory: DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT T____T

_______ Last ________
1. Person you saw: my sister
2. Talk on the phone: daddy
3. Person you kissed: like real kissed? my ex, looong time ago.. >__<
5: Instant Msg: to Marieke that I was sick and couldn't come today. SORRY

_______ First ________

1. Serious b/f or g/f: Mick
2. Job: working in the kitchin' for my mom, now in a fabric-shop

_______ Today ________
1. What are you doing now: you can guess..
2. Tonight: go to bed
3. Wearing: my PJ's
4. What did you eat for lunch: nothing, I was sleeping during lunch-time

_______ Tomorrow ________
1. Is: is not today.. IT'S SUNDAY THEN!
2. Got any plans: I'll go to Zeeland, if I'm better...
3. Goal: not throwing up! = D
4. Dislikes about tomorrow: the fact that I'm probably still sick
5. Likes about tomorrow: I'm going to Zeeland.

____________
NEXT

1) What gender are you?
Female

2) What is your age?
19

3) Do you want a hug?
not if you smell bad D=

4) Do you have any bad habits?
I start talking a LOT and FAST when I'm tired.. and I'm quite obsessive

5) What is your favorite food?
Chickin-curry & boerenkool = D

6) What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?
chocolatebrownie!

7) Are you a virgin?
you can guess that too!

8) Have you killed anyone?
in my dreams.. yeah..

9) Do you hate anyone?
hell yeah

10) Do you have any secrets?
yesh

11) What is your favorite season?
still autumn


12) Who is/are your best friend/s?
Yoeri, Kim, Froukje

13) What are your hobbies?
photography, art, friends, music

14) What is your favorite drink?
CHOCOLATEMILK

15) When is your birthday?
october 10th

16) What age did you die?
the day I stopped breathing

17) Are you nice or mean?
depends.. >=]

18) Are you social or shy?
both.. also depends x3

19) What do you think of your parents?
could be worse x3

20) What’s your weakness?
Stress.. it makes me throw up.. ex-boyfriends causing the most of it D=

21) How long can you stay under water?
dunno.

22) What do you do on a regular day basis?
eat, sitting behind my computer

23) Do you love someone?
yeah x3 friends, family, other people x3

24) When was the last time you wet yourself?
can't remember

25) What's your favorite band?
G R E E N D A Y

26) Ever worn a dress?
yyeah

27) Willingly?
yepp

28) What do you consider fun in the day-time?
photography, hanging out with friends

29) At night?
sleep.


30) Ever kissed anyone?
yeah

31) ...Of the same gender?
just a quick kiss, yeah xD

32) It's clear you're gay.
if I was a guy.. I guess so.. but I'm still a girl x3

33) What’s your favorite thing to touch?
ehrr.. don;t have a favourite thing to touch


34) Anyone love you?
nope

35) What’s your favorite color?
still pink & yellow


36) When was the last time you cried?
this morning

37) Do you have a pet?
2 cats; Lucas James & Puck, and a ugly dog; Lotje

38) What do you consider yourself an expert in?
being a dramaqueen

39) Are you crazy?
I'm normal, the world is crazy D=

40) What are you?
TIRED

41) What´s your nickname?
moes, mouse, muis [wow, mouse in frisian, english& dutch XD] Miertiert

42) Do you consider yourself a happy or a down person?
mostly down D=
*dramaqueen*

43) If you were a superhero, you'll be...?
lazy

44) Favorite movie?
The Timetraveler's Wife

45) What is your current occupation?
school?

46) Who do you know that bugs you?
somebody D=

47) What's your favorite song?
changes with my mood xD

48) Do you consider yourself a warrior?
NO WAY


49) Have you 'done it' in the past month?
nope x3

50) Ever think about getting married?
yeah.. STUPID dream

51) Have you ever had a sleepover with someone of the opposite sex?
hell yeah x3

52) When was the first time you 'did it'?
stop asking about sex xD

53) Do you have any piercings anywhere?
Ears

54) Any tattoos?
catpaws on my both feet <333

55) What's your worst nightmare?
the one that already became real xD

56) What do you want people to remember about you?
my photo's?


57) What's the most exotic place you've ever visited?
France

58) Boxers or Briefs?
boxers

59) If you could meet one person, living or dead, who would it be?
dunno..

60) I Tag:
go tag yourself, bitch D=

60) Final question. Who do you tag?
I tagged myself

________

LAST ONE.

☆ THREE NAMES THAT FRIENDS CALL YOU

- MIERTIERT
- Muis
- Moes

☆ THREE MOST IMPORTANT DATES OF YOUR LIFE

- 10th oct.
- 15th dec. '07
- somewhere in june of 2007, when I graduated = D

☆ THREE THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 30 MIN

- do these memes
- daid my mom goodnight
- get my chocolatemilk

☆ THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY

- going to green day
- being loved by the one you love
- ehr..

☆ THREE GIFTS YOU LIKE TO RECEIVE

- CD's
- New Camera
- A better lens

☆ THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES

- photography
- painting
- being a dramaqueen

☆ THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR VACATION

- London
- Prague [did I wrote that right?XD]
- Paris

☆ THREE FAVORITE DRINKS

- Chocolatemilk
- Tea
- Grape Juice

☆ THREE THINGS FOUND IN YOUR HANDBAG/BAG

- wallet
- pen & paper
- mostly my camera

☆THREE FAVORITE COLORS

- PINK
- YELLOW
- BLUE

☆ TOP THREE WHO YOU THINK WILL ANSWER THIS SURVEY

- Nobody
- Niemand
- NO ONE

☆ TOP THREE "THINGS" SPECIAL TO YOU

- photography
- friends
- hope

☆ TOP THREE REASONS THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY LATELY

- friends
- photography
- somebody, maybe, kinda

☆ TOP THREE REASONS WHY YOU ANSWERED THIS SURVEY

- boredom
- bored
- don't have anything else to do

☆ THREE JOBS I HAVE HAD IN MY LIFE

- working in a kitchin
- in a fabric-store
- photography = D


☆ THREE PLACES I HAVE LIVED

- Bakkeveen
- Nijega
- Groningen

☆ THREE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS

- Boerenkool
- Chickin-curry
- Pasta

☆ THREE PETS THAT YOU HAVE OWNED

- Siepie [cat]
- and other cat's
- and dogs, and fish.

☆ THREE FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH

- horseriding
- tennis
- gymnastics

actually.. I have to clean up my room a bit.. BUT I DON'T WANT TO! D=
I'll do that tomorrow evening & sunday. I think.. I have to :']
[can't change mood-thingy;-;]


1. What color is your bra?
Pink

2. Do you ever lie about your age?
Nah

3. Do you prefer "sensitive boys" or "tough guys"?
Guys who act tough but have a VERY sensitive side :3

4. Do you prefer blond or brunette guys?
dark hair plz

5. Are you currently single?
yeah.. ;--;

6. How many things in your past do you regret?
way too many

8. Do you have a best friend?
YESH! 3 <3

9. What do you want to be when you grow up?
Photographer

10. Have you ever kissed two people in one night?
Nope

11. Where do you shop to buy most of your clothes?
Internet & London Store

12. Who was the last person you hugged?
ehrr.. I think Yoeri

13. Have you ever had your heart broken?
I'm still

14. Have you ever thought about suicide?
loooong time ago

15. Have you ever wanted someone but you knew you couldn't have them?
hell yesh

16. Have you ever felt like killing somebody?
YESH~! D=<

17. If you could change anything about your past, what would you change?
all the things I regret

18. Do you like your life?
Sometimes

19. Do you shop at Hollister?
holli-what?

20. Has one of your friends ever stolen a boyfriend from you?
Kinda

22. Did you forgive them?
No. Don't talk to her anymore

23. Who was your first best friend?
Guido, I was not even a year old XD

25. How long have you had myspace?
few years, but I'm never on it.

26. Have you ever skipped school?
Yesh xD

27. Has anyone ever cheated on you?
I don't think so..

28. Have you ever slapped a boy in the face?
YESH XD my ex and I always bitchslapped each other, with LOOOOVE~ xD

29. If so, why?
I.. don't know.. ? :'] it was funny.

30. What are some of your biggest fears of your life?
Losing the most importan person in my life.. well that already happened, thank god for some other friends, they're worth living for too!

32. Has anyone close to you ever passed away?
Not since I was 3 years old..

33. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
Some periods I do it every night..

34. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head?
I'm trying for 13 months now to get a certain person outta my head..

35. Do you believe in the saying "once a cheater, always a cheater"?
Depens on how many times he/she cheated and in what situation

36. Are you a player?
HAHAHAHHA no.

37. What kind of cell phone do you have?
some sony ericson?

38. What is your screen name?
on dA; EngeltjeMaeli & Marthe-Elizabeth
on MSN; Cheatin' Eve Bonny [and I'd never cheated XD]

39. So far, do you like this survey?
too much about my feelings I guess

40. Have you ever had a good feeling about something and it turned out you were right?
sometimes

41. Do you ever wish you were famous?
as photographer, well.. I want to be a little bit famous when I'm older in that.. XD

42. Do you ever wish you were a man?
no, I'd be gay than, not that that matters.. but I like being a girl, most of the time =3

43. Do you think any men will open this just because it says the female survey???
those men are weird.